Sunday, June 20, 2010

Ah, It's Father's Day

It's a Bittersweet day around this neck of the woods.
My #1 Son is celebrating his first Father's Day as a Dad. And that is quite awesome.
He is a wonderful daddy. Not all men take to fatherhood in the way that we would hope.
Some keep a distance both emotionally and physically. Not my son. He is hands on and
filled with love for that little darling. And it really shows in Liam himself. He is such a happy and intelligent little guy. He gets so much love and attention from Mommy and Daddy that he feels confident and ready to enjoy all that the world holds for him.

As for Son #2 and myself, we are so blessed to have such thoughtful friends in our lives.
Myke took us out to the cemetery so that Jerry could visit his Dad. And then, we visited both of his Grandfathers as well.

It makes me sad to think of how much Hubby will miss out on with Son #2. No silly Father's Day gifts of crazy discount ties, clay ash trays, home made cards. And all the hugs that The Child would gladly give him were he still here.

The Child has been welded to my hip these days. Definitely Separation Anxiety. It's understandable. First he watched his father slowly perish, and then he watched his kitty perish. I don't know quite how to get him over that separation anxiety other than by reassuring him that I am not leaving him any time soon if I have my way. But it's a bit frustrating for me too. A Gal can't even step out in the back yard for a minute without coming back inside to find the Child in a panic thinking I had just up and left. It is just SO irrational! I would NEVER just up and leave!

The VNA Grief Social Worker comes this Tuesday. I will need to talk to her about this and see what she suggests. Do I just get on with things as normal and ignore it? Or do I let him know my every move? And if I do that, am I just feeding his phobia? And why don't they make Children's Chewable Xanax? I can see it now! Flintstone's Zoloft now in stoneberry flavour.

I'm just trying to get my own life on track and then these curve balls get thrown at me.
Such a long road we are on. When I rule the world, Loving Dads will not be allowed to leave us.

Friday, June 18, 2010

The World I know

Holy Crapolas, Batman! The muscles in my arms are just shaking!
I just spent the past two hours moving the old bed out of my room and assembling my new bed.
It looks beautiful now that it's all together. I'm glad I let loose and spent the money on it.
I've never had a new bed in my entire life. It's time to spoil myself a little.

Not that there was anything wrong with the former bed. It was wonderful. Just a little big for the small room it was living in. I'm not looking forward to disassembling it tomorrow. It's all wood with a million screws in it. And my wrists are toast from my marathon necklace-making sessions this week (That's another story and it was a labor of love, so it was worth it).

And I did all this whilst wearing a cute girly summer dress. I rule!

I have severe ADD these days. There are so many projects to complete around here. I am trying to focus on one room in the house at a time and get it finished before moving on to the next. But I am just too easily distracted. I have paint for the living room, and I'm tempted to get started on that, but I really ought to finish the bedroom first.... maybe.

Meanwhile, the new kitten is wrongly named. I think Satan would have been a better choice! He is just plain EVIL!!!! I sure hope he grows out of this mean stage he is in! He has started tormenting Octavia and she's dumb enough to let him! If she would just side-swipe the little bastage, she'd be back to alpha status!

I've got three hours worth of Garbage playing tonight. I went to my eldest son's birthday party last month and he was playing Garbage. I'd forgotten how much I'd missed Shirley! It's great music to work to. And great music to surf to as well.

I think I've finally stopped sweating now. Time for a nice cool shower and a chapter of Harry Potter in my nice new bed!

Have a great weekend, everyone!

Wednesday, June 9, 2010

Lighten Up

We adopted a new family member this week. Little Cracker is the perfect compliment to our all black Octavia. He is such a sweetie!

Saturday, June 5, 2010

Perfect Day

The Aurora Oshkosh 5K for Cancer was today. We all met out front by the bus stop. all.... um.... let's see... Me, Jerry, Andy, Linds, Liam, Barb, Bon, Mark, Ben, Jeremy, Sami, Jason, Jason's parents, Lee & Daughter, Myke, Ricky, Robin & Friend Kelli .... Yup! All 21 of us and two doggies! Team Brooks/ Kuhr was an impressive bunch.

And this year, even though our group was larger, I believe we made better time, completing the walk in One Hour, seven minutes. And we weren't dead last, either! We were third-to-last. Not that it really matters. It's the journey that counts.

The event coordinators sell flags prior to the event, so you can create a personal marker in honour of who you are walking for. We, of course, had two flags. In decorating Hubby's flag, I happened to have his picture along, because I was making badges for us all during free time at work. There are volunteers along the entire route cheering us on, and when we got to the corner of 9th and Oakwood, the volunteers there are not only very good volunteers, but also cancer survivors, and they saw our badges and said "Hey! Your flag is right here!" That was touching for me.

Mom and Dad's flag was near Oakwood and Witzel. I made sure I decorated it nice and bold so that we could spot it. The cool thing was that I wrote on it "Parents, Grandparents, Great-Grandparents". Baby Liam was an unknowing participant in something quite monumental.

Then afterward, we went to Nigl's on 9th for some ice cold pitchers of beer and free brats. That was oh so yummy! I ended up staying much longer than I had intended because we were having so much fun (The Child went off to a Birthday Party ages before I left). This gal doesn't normally drink beer, but after a 5K, it tastes divine!

How do you top that? Well, I came home and watched a Zombie movie on Hulu, and by the time The Child returned, I was ready for a nice, relaxing nap.

It's raining outside right now. A steady downpour. Let it rain. I'm just glad that God gave us such a perfect day for our walk and all that followed.

I'm thinking next year, we should design our own Team Brooks / Kuhr T-shirts. They should be blue because the ribbon for Lung Cancer is blue. And maybe with photos of my folks as well as Jimmy. And of course, we should include the phrase I can so hear hubby saying.... "Walk on, my friends, walk on."

Tuesday, June 1, 2010

Couldn't help but laugh

So I'm telling #1 son that today was a tough day at work, but as a means to make it a little nicer, I changed my cell phone picture to a photo I took on Sunday night of the fire we had in our back yard. Calming, peaceful, stress-free.

#1 son laughs and hands me his phone, and his wallpaper photo is of the fire that he had at his own house this weekend!

So now he really knows that he is not adopted!