Sunday, June 20, 2010

Ah, It's Father's Day

It's a Bittersweet day around this neck of the woods.
My #1 Son is celebrating his first Father's Day as a Dad. And that is quite awesome.
He is a wonderful daddy. Not all men take to fatherhood in the way that we would hope.
Some keep a distance both emotionally and physically. Not my son. He is hands on and
filled with love for that little darling. And it really shows in Liam himself. He is such a happy and intelligent little guy. He gets so much love and attention from Mommy and Daddy that he feels confident and ready to enjoy all that the world holds for him.

As for Son #2 and myself, we are so blessed to have such thoughtful friends in our lives.
Myke took us out to the cemetery so that Jerry could visit his Dad. And then, we visited both of his Grandfathers as well.

It makes me sad to think of how much Hubby will miss out on with Son #2. No silly Father's Day gifts of crazy discount ties, clay ash trays, home made cards. And all the hugs that The Child would gladly give him were he still here.

The Child has been welded to my hip these days. Definitely Separation Anxiety. It's understandable. First he watched his father slowly perish, and then he watched his kitty perish. I don't know quite how to get him over that separation anxiety other than by reassuring him that I am not leaving him any time soon if I have my way. But it's a bit frustrating for me too. A Gal can't even step out in the back yard for a minute without coming back inside to find the Child in a panic thinking I had just up and left. It is just SO irrational! I would NEVER just up and leave!

The VNA Grief Social Worker comes this Tuesday. I will need to talk to her about this and see what she suggests. Do I just get on with things as normal and ignore it? Or do I let him know my every move? And if I do that, am I just feeding his phobia? And why don't they make Children's Chewable Xanax? I can see it now! Flintstone's Zoloft now in stoneberry flavour.

I'm just trying to get my own life on track and then these curve balls get thrown at me.
Such a long road we are on. When I rule the world, Loving Dads will not be allowed to leave us.

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