I'm on that fence again...

So, I've been telling myself that I must quit smoking before the snow flies.
The top two reasons being 1) we simply cannot afford cigarettes AND the heat bill this winter.
and 2) I REFUSE to trudge through a mountain of snow just for a smoke!

At work, we are not allowed to smoke on campus for obvious reasons. So if we want one, we are expected to go over to the Grocery store across the street to smoke. That's fine and good for 3 seasons of the year. But come winter, the Maintenance guys run out of places to dump all of the snow. And there is no clear path to quickly cross over and back. It sucks! And it's not worth it!

Of course there are many other reasons why I need to quit smoking. My family health history is a blatant reminder that I just can't keep doing this. Especially if I want to see my youngest son grow up.

It's a costly habit. Drinking is much cheaper! (Joke!)

I also hate going to work wondering if I smell like a stale cigarette. And I'm sure I do.

And of course there's the health aspect. It really isn't fair to subject my son to second-hand smoke. And HE smells like a stale cigarette too!


The last time I quit, I tried Chantex. It worked somewhat. But it gave me horrible gas and digestive issues.

My doctor then gave me a sample of nicotine gum. YUCK! That is the most foul tasting crap ever!

So this time, I am going to try it cold turkey. And I know it won't be easy. But I have done it before. The difference this time will be that I will hopefully never go back to it.

So... I need to put stoppers in place to ensure that I do not go back to it.

I need to save the money I would otherwise have spent on cigarettes.
To the average person this sounds simple. Oh, but in my house, NOTHING is simple!
The last time I quit, I had started saving the cash I would have spend on smokes and my husband protested to no end. Maybe he saw it as a threat to his own smoking habit? I just don't know. But I know it caused so much stress that I gave in and put all of that money toward bills instead of saving it for something special.

THIS TIME, I'm not budging. I'm going to take out $35 a week from our checking account for the next year and sit on it. The most I would be wiling to sacrifice toward bills and household expenses is $15 of that $35. This is not going to be an easy journey, and damn it! I DESERVE a reward for it! I'm going to spend $1200 on myself come next September. Maybe I'll use it on a trip to Florida to see my cousin. Maybe I'll buy new kitchen cabinets. Who knows. I have a whole year to decide.

In the mean time, this blog will be a constant reminder of my goal. I MUST achieve my goal! I WILL achieve my goal!

I tell my nieces that they can do anything if they set their minds to it. It's time I live up to that belief.